Dancing with Whatever Comes to Your Door
When I lived in Denver years ago, I belonged to the Crimson Circle (www.crimsoncircle.com) and I would go each month to hear channeled messages from Tobias. One of the most important channels he talked about was about the importance of dancing with whatever came to your door. It took me a long time to grasp the wisdom of this teaching. When I first began walking the spiritual path, I had a much more active mental body and I used to feel that I needed to read books, attend workshops and channels or constantly chase the new, shiny bauble in my pursuit for personal and spiritual growth.
Now I realize that my soul constantly magnetizes to me whatever I need to learn and grow so I don’t need so much to seek or look outside myself for stuff (although I still enjoy learning new things). I also have the huge benefit of having clients who mirror back to me whatever I need to personally focus on myself. Before I do work on anyone else, I always work on myself first so my soul magically sends me clients with very similar life challenges as myself.
I recently had a very interesting challenge in my life that inspired me to revisit this area and to write a blog post about it. Over the holidays, I managed to get a blank cd stuck on the top of the innards of my laptop. My first challenge was to clear and heal the irritation I felt toward myself around the situation before I began beating up on myself about doing this.
My second challenge came when I noticed that whenever I was using the laptop thereafter that I would be listening for weird sounds and feeling the laptop for heat to make sure the blank cd was not melting inside my laptop. This is a great example of negative visualization. When I realized that I was experiencing a low level of anxiety, worry and obsessiveness around it, I promised myself that I would take it into the shop. That choice or decision immediately relieved much of the anxiety I was feeling about it.
Before I took the laptop to the shop around noon, I got an agreement from the laptop healer that he would remove the disk for $35 by 6 pm on Tuesday. When I called at 5:00 pm to find out when I could pick up the laptop, the office was closed. I really had planned to do a lot of work that night on the laptop so I was frustrated by not having it back on time so I had to clear that. I also had to clear my attachment of relying on people to do what they say they will do.
On Wednesday morning after several calls, I was able to actually talk to the laptop healer and he promised to have it done by 11:00. Much relieved I went to the shop around noon to pick it up and the office was closed. I thought they were out to lunch so I came back at 1:30 and the office was still closed. I called the office and left a message; I called the laptop healer on his cell phone and left a message and then I texted him (which I rarely do). I was very annoyed that I did not get a response from either the laptop healer or the guy in the store. I also took it a tad personally that the laptop healer did not call me back to let me know that he was unable to do the work that morning as promised. So I had to clear that too.
Around 3 pm on Wednesday, I was checking my BlackBerry for emails and I realized that the whole time my laptop was in the shop that I had only earned $9. This was the lowest income day I had experienced in many years. So I got stressed about that. And it was the day of my free group healing for over 900 people and I got stressed about doing the healing from my current state of anxiety. So I decided to mediate for a while and after getting calm, I decided that the next day I would just go ahead and buy another laptop as a spare if the laptop healer’s office was closed on Thursday.
It was very clear to me after meditating that I was very laptop-dependent and that this is who I am at this time. At this point I decided to cop out. I decided to stop healing the constant anxiety, stress, frustration and anger around not having a laptop and to just accept the fact that I need a laptop at all times for optimal health and well being and it would be money well spent to buy a spare. So I did some inner work around self acceptance, allowing and deserving to have a dependable laptop at all times no matter what.
Thursday arrived and the shop was still closed and the laptop healer guy’s cell phone went directly to the answering machine. I immediately left their office and spent two hours looking at laptops at Walmart, Best Buy and Office Depot. I saw a great Toshiba on year end clearance sale in Office Depot and heard a mental click that this was the one. So I happily bought the laptop, took it home and started loading software. Within an hour I was up and running again. Life was good and sales began to hugely pick up back to normal.
This experience reaffirmed on many levels to me that how I feel definitely influences the flow of money and abundance into my life. When I am stressed, frustrated, irritated, annoyed and angry about something, I repel money right and left. I also realized that part of my stress was that I was not looking at the situation clearly.
My past experience with buying laptops was influencing my current behavior. The first laptop I bought was over $2,500 and it was a major expenditure. The second one cost $2,000; the third one cost $1,500; the fourth one cost $800 and the newest one just cost $530. In other words, laptops are now disposable and it is not a huge thing to buy a new one.
The laptop healer guy called on Friday saying his grandmother had died and he had another personal crisis on top of that so he had to unexpectedly close the office for two days. He fixed the laptop at no charge and I picked it up on Monday morning. By that point, however, I was not triggered at all. I had realized by then that the situation really wasn’t about the laptop healer at all. It was about me and learning some things I needed to learn via this interesting life experience. I was giving a lot of power to an external circumstance and it resulted in a lot of chaos.
He he he. I still get a warm fuzzy feeling in my heart as I look at the backup laptop on my desk as I write this blog on my old one.
About Spiritual Healer Bill Austin:
Bill Austin is an energy healing facilitator, spiritual teacher, artist, writer and visionary living in St Petersburg, Florida in the United States. Bill specializes in distance healing, spiritual growth, healing art and healer training. He is the founder of several Reiki and other energy healing modalities. He has trained healers in over sixteen countries and has helped people from all over the world to heal, grow, expand and realize more of their full potential. Bill infuses healing and enlightenment energies into healing art images and has created a line of self help books. You can click on this link to download a free healing ebook called: Vibrational Color Healing Art. He offers a number of free energy healing resources on the freespiritualhealing.com web site